It has been a long time since I wrote anything on the blog. I notice that I have to search for a beginning, as if words fall short of everything that has changed.
A lot has happened. Maybe too much to put into writing, but it still feels important to try.
It has now been over seventeen months since I last came. Sometimes I ask myself if I miss it. The answer is yes. The desire is strong, every single day. But it is precisely that desire that gives me strength. It keeps me focused, present. If it were up to me, I would never come again.
My life has taken on a clear shape. I now have three owners; the third is a cousin of my other owners. In addition, there is a regular client whom I visit regularly, under supervision, as Lola. That role has become who I am.
I wear an internal chastity device and live essentially 24/7 as Lola. My days consist of tasks in and around the house, and on Thursdays at my owner’s cousin’s place. Everything has structure, rules, meaning. As thanks, I drink urine daily—my own or my owners’—kiss and lick their shoes, and receive their spit. It is part of my existence, of my place.
When I do not visit the client, he gives me filled condoms, which I empty under the supervision of my owners. It is humiliating, but also affirming. This is where I belong.
I have contact almost daily with Sub Slut Poppet. That contact means a great deal to me. It feels like being seen. We share thoughts, desires, fantasies. I also discuss these with my owners. Everything is allowed to exist; nothing has to be hidden.
I am regularly locked in my “parking space,” a separate room in the house. There I must chain myself to the wall. In that space I do my daily training: makeup practice, deep oral training with dildos, and sitting on a dildo stool. Sometimes I stay there for hours. I cannot free myself and am completely dependent. That dependency is what makes everything clear and quiet in my mind.
This is where I am now.
Up to here.

My First Facial

 

Slut Training

 

Cum Slut

I am not allowed to post any photos as this is prohibited by my owners.

But now I have permission to share a photo, this is the first time as a Whore and Cum Slut and I swallowed cum.

As it stands now, this will be my regular customer who wants to use me as a Whore and Cum Slut.

All this is under the supervision of my owners. The customer has a large amount of cum production that surprised me. 

And  I swallowed everything after permission from owners...

Condom

Loads: 4

Swallowed: 4

What a surprise, owner 2 suddenly arrives with 3 used condoms.

No idea where they came from, but I was busy with my duties at owner 2. Owner 2 was away and when she came back I had to come to her. After kissing her shoes and licking her soles, she had a surprise for me. From her bag she took a plastic bag with clearly used condoms in it. 

I immediately knew what was expected of me.

 I spontaneously got shivers and looked at her.

 Without saying a word, I took the condoms from the bag (3 pieces). Owner 2 said, now it comes down to you Herman, are you really my dirty whore Lola or will you back down? All kinds of things were going through my mind at that moment! Yes, I want to be her whore!!!

She looks at me I want to show her that I will do anything. I grab a condom and squeeze the contents into my mouth. I taste cold seed but I am not allowed to swallow it yet, so I empty the others first. I'm trying to get everything out as best I can. 

I show that I still have everything in my mouth, after which she spits heavily into it.

She puts her thumb in my mouth and I have to suck on it hard.

She looks straight at me, Herman Herman, I'm going to make you my ultimate whore, I don't want to hear any defense or anything like that. 

I could only nod...

I suddenly realize that I haven't come in a while.

I am now locked in a small cage 24/7 and my owners find my sissy clit is not important at all.  

My drive is the desire to come. If I'm honest, I'm excited 24/7 and long for my release. But it is so contradictory because I don't want to come, I want to show my owners that I am their property who is not allowed to decide anything.

What do I enjoy then? 

I am also surprised by this. I think it is difficult to explain. But compare it to when you are horny, you come up with all sorts of things, you fantasize about wanting to do all kinds of things and then you have release and suddenly that feeling, the urge is gone.

So if you are not allowed or cannot ejaculate, that feeling remains constantly present. You keep walking around 24/7 with the feeling and wanting to do everything. A year ago I didn't understand this either, but now I never want to go back.

My owners know this well and take advantage of it. I am therefore completely at the service of the owners. I really do everything for them and in this way they fulfill my wishes.

The greatest desire is to be a complete whore. Right now I want to drink as much cum as possible. After my first visit to a customer I want more. I understand from the owners that the customer wants to receive my every week. I also asked the owners if the customer want to save his seed for a week so that I can drink 7 seed releases in one go...

So it remains to be seen whether I can really become a Cum Slut...

HURE

A long story short.

My desire to be a whore and cum bucket has been fulfilled.

I've fantasized about it for a long time, but I sucked my first real cock like a whore.

Gave someone a blowjob and received his seed in my whore's mouth (thanks).

And after a command from my owner, I swallowed everything. 

As a real whore!

Thanks to the customer for his delicious cock and cum.

A very big thank to both my owners who organized this.

I hope the counter goes up soon, I can't wait to swallow more cum...

XXX Cum SLUT Lola

ART Work

 

Kurfürstenstraße

 2025 is a year where I can hopefully fulfill my wish.

In the last days of 2024, I reviewed the past year with my owners.

I also set goals for 2025. My input was that I would really like to offer myself on the street as Piss and Sperm Sluts.

I really want to show my owners that I do everything for them. That I really want to be a real Sissy Whore. Offering myself and making money for my owners. 

I have walked around the Kurfürstenstraße as Lola and I have been approached, which was very exciting. Now I really have to serve as many customers as possible as a whore in a mini skirt and high heels. 

I hope my owners make this possible!!!

Christmas present

When we got home on saterday my Christmas present had been delivered.
I didn't know anything about this, it was an idea from owner 1 so that I could lie quietly in the living room under the supervision of the owners.

 

 

 

And so after dinner I started using it. I feel like a real slut lying in the corner of the room like that.

Blindfold mouth dildo and butt plug all my holes filled what more could a slut want!

Every now and then my useless balls would be hit by an owner's foot and my nipples would be pinched (next time I'll ask for nipple clamps). 
I don't know how long, but I was released and thanked the owners very much for the wonderful Christmas gift. It is still in the room and when I walk past it I long for it.

Sometimes I don't know it, all I can think about is how I can serve and be used.  I think I definitely have some kind of brainwashing. Because even when I lie there, I fantasize that everyone can see me, especially acquaintances or family, so that it is clear that I am their total slut slave. Are these crazy thoughts? Am I brainwashed? I actually think so, as all normality has been repressed and I'm happy when I'm Lola the slut...

Do you recognize that....

Schlampiges Loch

 

This week I was corrected and I have to show that I am submissive slut and very much serve my owners. I have to do all my tasks in perfection without contradiction.

I sleep separately and have strict dress codes. I also have to move between the two houses in these clothes

But this afternoon during the lunch that I had prepared for owner 2,

 I had to come to her. It was time for inspection.

Now I wear a new butt plug during my tasks I thought she wanted to inspect that. But no, I was expected at 2 o'clock as Lola so with wig, make-up, nylons and my high heels and a large dildo and without a butt plug. I need the key to my cage for that and I removed it in the presence of the owner. No idea what to expect.

At 2 o'clock I was ready and was immediately placed on a large stool and the assignment "shows how flexible your sissy hole is".

There you are, fucking yourself with a dildo. I was already horny because of the situation but the dildo made it even more intense.

 

 

Lying on my back and holding my legs. Owner 2 put on latex gloves and inspected my fuck hole

A little later 4 fingers went in and slowly her hand disappeared in my hole. Now this was the second time but it all went very smoothly. A little later her hand went in and out slowly. Her fist went smoothly into my hole. Slowly at first but later it went faster.

I was actually real fisted for the first time. Her fists went in and out of my willing horny fuck hole. 

I had no control over myself anymore and said all kinds of horny things. Looking at her while she does this makes me submissive, I want to do everything for her. 

What control owner 2 has over me.... 

I felt like such a whore I leaked quite a bit.

 

 

But suddenly it was over I was exhausted my fuck hole was completely limp and I couldn't stand on my legs.

Owner 2 was very satisfied and immediately went to report it to the owner 1. I was allowed to recover on the bed first. My fuck hole was very sensitive and I was still a bit out of this world. At 5 o'clock I was called and both owners were in the living room. Where they ordered food.

I had my work outfit back on, shirt and apron, the owners looked at me as if nothing had happened....

 

 

 

Weekend

 Sometimes the unexpected happens. I was working in the kitchen owner 2 comes in I immediately sit in my position.
Then behind her back a bowl of her delicious piss appears.
She grabs my me head and I put my mouth on the edge of the bowl.  After which the order look at me and drink it all. Then owner 2 very slowly pours my mouth full, I know I may only swallow it at her command. I feel and taste her delicious piss what a pleasure I shiver all over my body. Especially looking at that really makes me her submissive slut whore.  The last remaining piss I have to gargle so I taste her well. I am so grateful to her that I kiss and lick her shoes.

She looks at me smiling and then says yes Herman this you could not have dreamed a year ago that you are now my piss whore....



What a wonderful start to the weekend

24/7

 

Growing up in the 70s where my own self was suppressed. My feelings of who I really am was put aside.

I am not complaining because I am very happy now. My feminine side gets all the space and can really be who I am.

So who and what am I?

I am a big guy but inside I am a total slave and a whore.

I am owned by 2 owners (my wife and her sister). I sold my business and am available to my owners 24/7. My sissy clit is locked up 24/7 and wear sexy work clothes 24/7. Stockings, mini bikini, highheels, short sport skirt and short sweater. I have duties in two houses and am busy with that. Also, in the houses I have a closet/room (my parking space) where when I am done with nothing more to do I have to lock myself in and fasten with a belt that has to be locked. There is also a stool with a dildo on it and a dildo on the wall.  Furthermore, I have my own sleeping place so that if necessary the owners can sleep peacefully.
I am every other day with owner 1 and the next day with owner 2. Around 6:30 my day starts with rinse clean (I do every morning) get dressed and take care of breakfast.
The rest of the day I am busy with tasks in and around the house.

As soon as I see an owner I have to show my submission by (at the moment) sitting like a trash can on my knees with hand holding my feet and mouth wide open. A nod from owner I immediately turn me around and show my sissy pussy.

Owner 2 is much more dominant her look is felt enough to make me do anything. And I really mean everything.
Owner 1 is my great love she has made this all possible. How special is this?

I adore the anus of both owners I want nothing more than taste their delicious anus. I also like to drink their delicious hot piss.

I feel completely free with no worries. I am only taking care of the owners in any way.

Also finacial I have no worries.  All my money and property have been transferred to the owners. I have a bank card where I can buy things if necessary. Everything I buy must be discussed with one of the owners.  Furthermore I am Herman 1 day a week (my sissy klit stays locked up).

After an email exchange with Poppet Sub Slut the owners are planning to add a dice challenge. I have no idea what the challenges will be I am allowed to bring in my own challenges.

Owner 1 has a public job and is reluctant to bring out our way of life. Owner 2 has less of a problem with that, so I go into town with her as Lola. I get a lot of looks from especially men but so far never anything really negative.

Because of our way of living our family and friends have become a lot smaller. Nobody really knows anything. Owner 1 intends to share our way of life within a small circle.

Personally, I am a little afraid of that anyway but if owner 1 wants me to, I have to accept that.
I think it will not be long before I have to present myself as Lola to family and friends.
The idea makes me nervous but it also excites me.

For now a glimpse into our life so far....
 

My greatest desire and drive is to be their total slave and whore. Nothing makes me hornier than the idea of being whored out by the owners. Standing by the side of the road in mini skirt and being used and making money for the owners.

 

 This fantasy is very strong and the idea that one day this might become reality makes me who I am today.

Lola

 

 
 

Fernsehturm

 

Owner 2 in front of the  Fernsehturm ;-)

The time had come and it had been a while since I had been on the streets as Lola.

So my best outfit, all in black leather. Skirt with a tight leather jacket on top. Nothing more than suspender with stockings and my calf boots with high heels. Neatly made up and wig half-length hair and big earrings.

After inspection and some correction from owner 2 we got into the car and headed towards the Fernsehturm. The tower is located at  Alexanderplatz in former East Berlin .

At the tower I had to get out and walk around and wait for owner 2. There are always tourists at this place and then you suddenly stand there. I just walked around a bit and I saw quite a few looks that secretly looked at me. What struck me most is that men look secretly and women much more openly.

I wasn't completely at ease and I felt like it took quite a while for owner 2 to arrive. 

Now I'm quite a head taller than owner 2, but she grabbed my arm so we walked around arm in arm. 

Owner had another surprise, a visit to the observation deck of the tower. I entered the elevator with slightly shaking knees. Not that I'm afraid of heights, but more that I can't hide there. Looked for a spot upstairs and enjoyed the view. I also had to get a drink and despite the fact that it is very clear that I am a man, no comments at all.  But also secret glances from men. I think many men would like their partner to look like me ;-)

Received a lot of compliments from owner 2 and she promised that I would get a reward at home. 

Went downstairs and waited there again until the owner had picked up the car. After which we drove to owner 2's house. 

The tension came out in the car. Was shaking and even felt tears.

Back from gone

I don't know where to start

A lot has changed in recent months. I am now owned by two owners. One is my wife's and the other is my sister-in-law. 

Owner 2 is much more dominant than owner 1 also her appearance is more dominant. I will not take back everything that has changed or happened in recent months. I have stopped working, and am actually 24/7 Lola. 

My Sissi clit is also locked and I still have to perform my daily tasks.  Other thinks has changed when owner 2 finds me in the room, for example, I have to immediately take the ashtray posture. So on my knees my hands hold my ankles or high heels, head back, mouth wide open. 

I really long for piss, how bad this can be. So regularly I sit as an ashtray open mouth and I get a glass of pee poured into my mouth. I can only swallow this if it is allowed. I also have to gargle my mouth with piss. 

Furthermore, I am busy with my daily tasks that is the household, preparing food and 15 minutes of deep dildo blowjobs and 15 minutes of working on my makeup skills. So I'm pretty busy. I will try to write something more regularly on the blog.

Will be continued

Condom Filling

UPDATE!!! 

A lot has changed and I am very happy. I will come back to it, but at the moment I am waiting for an order for condoms and a magic wand. I am addicted to used condoms, but my owners don't want me to actively look for them. Because they are concerned it is not very safe. To indulge my addiction, the owner 2 allows me to fill condoms myself and save them for a later time. I don't know exactly what the intention is, so I'll have to wait and see what she plans to do with it. I can't wait, be exciting and HORNY... 

To be continued.....

Reinigungstag und Strap-on-Dildo

  

Dildo

Cleaning day and strap-on dildo

It worked out that my cleaning day was on Sunday. It's quite special mainly because my wife is completely at peace with this. She allows her sister to use me. I love my wife and will do anything for her. But back to Sunday, I got up early, first made breakfast in bed for my wife, and then did my preparations. Everything was thoroughly rinsed and a large butplug was immediately installed. Dressed up like Lola, I did my make-up (it's getting better and better because, together with deep dildo blowjobs, make-up is a daily workout). I had just finished when I heard my sister-in-law coming. So quickly remove the butplug. I notice that my sissy pussy is becoming more and more flexible and lose. And hopefully soon I can actually get fisted...

And as the assignment is, skirt up, legs wide and my buttocks spread so she can get a good look at my sissy pussy. I was so horny that I was already leaking. But she walked right past me straight to my wife's bedroom. After 10 minutes she came down with a large strapon in here hand and orderd me to go with her. It is now really light in the morning and sitting in the car is super exciting because you never know who will be standing next to you. In any case, I try not to make eye contact and look straight ahead. The neighbors could see me now too. But I think when they see me they have no idea this is me. In the car I am so horny that my clit comes out from under my skirt,  I don't get a comment about it. I can hardly keep myself from touching my sissy clit. I just want to cum and drink piss, I'm just completely horny, horny, horny....

The slut couldn't wait for cleaning!!!!

Alter Ego

 

Who am I?

If you read this blog you might think, what kind of strange guy is this? But I'm not that strange. I have an alter ego and these two egos are intertwined. Then I am Lola the slut and then I am Herman again. But as Herman, Lola is always present in the background. And certainly to the outside world I am Herman. My wife and I do a lot together, but I also have friends and hobbies of my own. If we can, we eat out at least once a week and we follow Trip Advisor and eat at different restaurants, lately my sister-in-law has also been coming along. The counter now stands at 182😀

I also exercise every other day and run. I am also a sports shooter. Now it is true that my alter ego is always present. I think about that in everything I do. Or when I wear lingerie under my normal clothes. I also think about it constantly at work. Lola is always present. 

It has become stronger lately now that my sister-in-law is also part of this. She is much stricter and has a dominant appearance. She only has to look at me and I can feel it going through my whole body. It also feels liberating because this has been approved by my wife and owner. The rule is still when I see my sister-in-law I immediately have to show her my sissy pussy. If that is not possible because we are in company, then her glance is sufficient and I nod as a sign that I still know what is expected of me. So all in all, our triangle relationship is quite normal, perhaps strange...

Geschäft

 

It's been a while, but I had to buy lingerie as an assignment, physically in a store where I also had to make it clear that it was for myself. After much hesitation and searching, I found a store and went inside. On my list was a black slip dress, slip and stockings, possibly with a suspender. Once inside, there were 2 other customers, the saleswoman came to me and asked can I help you. Yes, a slip, stockings and suspenders. And she asked what is the size of your partner, I assume it is for your partner.

I looked at her in a woman in her 40s and thought what the heck, no, it's for myself. The answer was surprising, how special, but I am happy to help you. And she did that, she even measured my chest size and after half an hour I was outside. I have no idea what she thought of me, but that doesn't matter because she really helped me.

Once at home I was allowed to  show it to my wife. I was so excited about this adventure and my wife noticed that too. She was very sweet to me, I was allowed to jerk off myself but I couldn't come...

Fickloch-Inspektion

 I have been offline for a while and that is because stricter rules have been introduced.

So the tattoo was postponed... And I had to buy lingerie. Physically in a store where I had to tell them that it was for myself. More about that later.

I am also only allowed to treat my wife with a strap-on dildo (this is considerably larger than my sissy clit). I can treat her orally and I can also deeply tongue her lovely anus. I'm not allowed to cum and it's been 3 weeks now. I sometimes wear a penis cage, but most of the time I don't.

The strict rules have been set and apply especially when cleaning my sister-in-law's house. I was way too bold. I am no longer allowed to look and speak to her. But the biggest rule is that as soon as she is in the same room or I come into a room where she is. I have to lie directly on my stomach with my ass open, legs wide and spread my buttocks with my hands. So I have to show my sissy pussy. Until she is gone or she says move on. The only time where it is not is lunch. I can just sit there.

Monday is my cleaning day at home, nothing has changed. Still in front of the camera and collecting piss. When I'm done I have to wait for her. But so far I'm not allowed to do anything with the piss. I have to sleep separately in my lola out fit.

The next day I am Herman again.

When my sister-in-law comes to visit I have to change clothes (nylons high heels) and as soon as I am in the same room I have to show my sissy pussy on my stomach.

I really feel like a WHORE at those moments...